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19/9/2014

Lessons for my 20 year old self

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This past week I have been mostly thinking about lessons that I would give my 20 year old self. Things that I never know but now realise, things that I, although a very reflective person should have done differently. Maybe it's because of the recent rushing around, being in two places at once. The working single mum going from school to work, work to school, keeping the home and managing the tiny budget all the while wondering if the state of financial wobble is even worth the rushing around. 

I was thinking about the 20 year old me, just coming out of university, about to turn 21, lovely boyfriend at the time and a fabulous family. I was wondering whether she would be proud of my achievements today, whether they match the ambition I had at the time. I had so much ambition. Like the young people of today; "NEETS" as it were, hope snatched away with every rejection until all that's left is a hollow shell of your former self. The child with so many dreams and a heart full of love and promise. 

I was thinking about what she would say about me not being married. Independent, confident, ok but not married. I have carried on and been so busy that this last week, it has suddenly struck me that I am alone. The Bible states "... Husband to the husbandless" but what about the the companionship of Adam and Eve? Was it not God's intention that we would be one? I'm sure we do all yearn for the "balance"

So today's lesson to my 20 year old self:
1. You are more than your relationship status
2. Sometimes the people you aspire to be do not know what they are doing and are also making it up as they go along
3. If you want relationship advise, ask an older woman
4. Sometimes you will yearn for the love of another, we are made of love and it is what keeps us going.
5. You are someone else's inspiration so keep smiling and be the example

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